"She had over come her minor defects, only to be defeated by matters of fundamental importance. she had managed to appear utterly independent, when she was, in fact, desperately in need of company. When she entered a room, everyone would turn to look at her, but she almost always ended the night alone, in the convent, watching a TV that she hadn't even bothered to have properly tuned in. She gave all her friends the impression that she was a woman to be envied, and she expended most of her energy in trying to behave in accordance with the image she had created of herself.
Because of that,she had never had enough energy to be herself, a person who, like everyone else in the world, needed other people in order to be happy.... She may have impressed a lot of people with her strength and determination, but where had it left her? In the void, Utterly alone."
Sounds familiar? Sounds like someone you know?
It sure does sounds like someone I know - M.E.
Many times I wished I had the strength and the capacity to just do something out of the extraordinary...Something that is not on my daily constant monotanous basis. Something,for myself.I guess no matter how much I wih for that, it will never happen. You and I. We're all so similar. We live for others. We don't live for ourselves. Call me a bull. You know it's true. So now I wonder, what is, the true purpose to life when we're all living in a void, alone and in denial of the fact that happiness sems far fetched.
What is happiness to you? Are you happy?
If you are; I wished you could teach me because i am far from it.
Like I said, again and again, previously:-
Baby steps; Learning, Grasping. Next step- Implementation.
06/12/09
------------------------------------------------------------------------------p/s: It's my late choir master's 1st death anniversary today. RIP Robert Phang.You're always in our thoughts and fond memories.Remembrance of you everlasting.
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